Applesauce

By Jan Harmon
words and music © 1988

  Chorus:
	OH GOSH!  It's a MacIntosh!
	Squash it into applesauce, please.
	Golden Delish, with dapples . .
	Northern Spy, Granny Smith,
	lip-smackin' pippins with cheese . .
	How do you like them apples?

  1. 	Isaac Newton took a nap, well,
	at least until that apple fell
	and hit him on his cranial cavity.
	He sat up and screamed,
	"By gum . . it's a GRAVENSTEIN!"
	And, everybody thought he said . . GRAVITY!  (Chorus)

  2. 	Johnny Appleseed succeeded in seeding apple seeds.
	From sea to sea, the seeds he seeded you can still see!
	Well, you can sip cider thru a straw,
	but, don't sit under the apple tree
	with anybody else but me!  (Chorus)

  3.	Now . . APPLE's a computer, and it couldn't be cuter!
	There's a menu for every APPLE appetite.
	They've even got software for APPLE pi-R-square.
	So, cook some up, and have a little gigabyte!  (Chorus)

  4.	In Eden, Eve and Adam percieved their anatomies
	PURE . . as nuns in a chapel . .
	'til a pippin Eve was nibblin' labled Eve evil . .
	BUT HECK!  It was Adam's . . apple!  (Chorus)

  5.	After serving him the streudel, William Tell said to him,
	"Won't you let me shoot this apple off your noodle?"
	Then . . aiming for the fruit . .
	an arrow Will did shoot . .
	but he shot him in the streudel . .
	TOODLE-OODLE!  (Chorus)