The Bay View Street Cinema
By Jan Harmon
words and music © 1989
for Doug Hall
CHORUS: I Wanna go down to the Bay View Street Cinema.
I hear they're playin' King of Hearts.
Nothin' could be sweeter than to sit there in the theater
just waitin' for the picture to start.
Now, it really doesn't matter what the picture might be ..
long as you're sittin' kinda close to me.
I wanna go down to the Bay View Street Cinema,
and hold your hand in the dark.
1. Roof saggin'. What a drag! You know .. something's in the Maytag
that's turning everything pink.
Septic's backed .. pipes cracked .. I got the sack!
The cat's got fur balls .. so does the sink!
We oughta go see Bela Lugosi and Vincent Price.
For three bucks we got Cougat and Sonja Henning on ice ..
Esther Williams is in the swim .. Tarzan goes out on a limb ..
HEY JIM .. go warm up the Chrys .. ler, we'll go ..
2. Mother-in-law got stuck in Waldo. We hauled 'er home, but
she missed Geraldo! Goo thing she didn't miss Morton Downey!
Hairs thinner, thighs fatter, eyes dimmer, feets flatter ..
might as well have a brownie!
But when you're nose to nose in those close-up kisses with
Gregory Peck .. you never have halitosis, or a crink in your neck.
You're a STAR by osmosis! And you can expect HAPPY TRAILS
with Roy and Trigger .. Heckle and Jeckle and Porky Pig ..
Yer turn to pay fer the Necco wa .. fers, down ..
3. Now, there's the ER-IR-EP .. A, the GOP, the KKK,
There's IVs and PCBs in the water.
ACLU, the NRC, NAACP .. OH GEE!
Where the heck is my Captain Midnight decoder?
TGIF! I need some TLC! My PMS is killing me!
RSVP .. if you'd rather see X .. R .. or PG!
We'll pay Doug our mo-ney. Pick up some Pep-si ..
watch Curley, Moe and Larry .. it's Heston in a chariot ..
Harriette .. turn off the VC .. R, we'll go ..
4. Missiles site us .. black flies bite us .. Jim and Tammy ..
Oil slicks on the beaches ..
Dump them chemicals! Save them whales! Gorbachev meets Bush and Quayle ..
Don't it leave ya sorta .. speechless?
Global troubles .. baby's gas bubbles burst in the hall ..
Leave the ring in the tub, the smudge on the wall ..
Doll, you can be Bogie .. I'll be Bacall!
Now, the popcorn's a little tough .. but the screen's just big enough
to make all our struggles feel small! Let's all go ..