Mother Got Took by the Draft
aka. Please Stand By
or, Ah-h Your Mother Wears Army Boots!
By Jan Harmon
words and music © 1980
1. The sturdy life boat of the family,
is foundering now, fore and aft,
it is sinking by heck, the whole country's a wreck,
since mother got took by the draft.
2. Instead of at home fixing biscuits,
she's spending her weekends at camp,
fixing bayonet mounts, shouting hand grenade counts,
and learning to sing tramp, tramp, tramp.
3. And she's learning the virtues of napalm,
she's learning to hate and despise,
every foreign-tongue cuss who thinks different from us,
she'd never learn that baking pies.
CHORUS: And she sings .. close your little eyes my baby,
don't you cry,
arm in arm, we're headin' for armageddon,
and our nuclear lullaby.
4. And won't it be grand when the army,
is drafting whole family groups,
from babies in Pampers to grampas in campers,
the nuclear family troops.
5. We'll sit round the fox holes together,
enjoying k-rations and Spam,
just picking off lice, saying "isn't this nice!",
too bad we missed Vietnam.
And we'll sing .. close your little eyes my baby,
don't you cry,
arm in arm, we're headin' for armageddon,
and our nuclear lullaby.
6. And if we get hit by a missile,
it won't be a tragic occurence,
for there will be no one left to mourn us bereft,
or to cash in on our insurance.
7. And as my momma sang this lullaby,
safe in her arms I lay,
while a voice from above cried god is love,
and isn't there some other way.
Close your little eyes my baby,
don't you cry,
arm in arm, we're headin' for armageddon,
and our nuclear lullaby.
8. Meantime it does seem peculiar,
to find that the kitchen is staffed,
by one who salutes and wears army boots,
since mother got took by the draft.